How do I connect? No! not to the internet but with everyone and everything I come across. This question has been on my mind for a long time.
I meet so many people everyday; the security guard who gives me a smile when I walk across him, the acknowledgement of the conductor of the bus who has noticed that I am the only one in the bus getting down in the last stop and I could go on... But, do I connect with them? A nod, a smile and then I do not think about it anymore. Is there a connection there or is it that I choose not to connect more than that?
Sometimes a bond develops with people whom we are meeting for the first time. We don't mind sharing our thoughts, feelings with them. We take the risk of opening up, becoming vulnerable to them without knowing them well. How does that happen? Are we aware that we are choosing to do so or it happens naturally?
Two years back, I was down with dengue admitted in the hospital and sharing the room with an elderly person being looked after by a young girl. While going through the agonising wait of my blood count to go up, I noticed that the young girl did not know any language other than hindi. She was finding it hard to converse with the nurses and was looking sad. Anyways, I had nothing much to do, so started talking to her. There was a slight hesitation in the beginning but, then she opened up and talked about her village, her brother who had brought her here and how this was her first job. We spoke for a long time, she asked lots of questions and was at ease after that.
As the elderly patient was not used to her, he refused to drink from her hands and was being difficult, so I went up to him, spoke to him in tamil and ended up feeding him.
All this happened over a period of four days, after which I was discharged. That girl was not happy at all and was worried how she would handle after I left. I assured her that she would manage. I also gave her my phone number incase she needed to talk to someone.
After few days, I received a call and it was the girl from the hospital. She said," Didi, it is me. Uncle was released the next day and he is fine. My brother bought me a mobile and I thought of you. You are the first person I have called. I wanted to tell you that I am doing fine and thank you for helping me in the hospital".
This was such an unexpected surprise. It actually made me think that in the hospital we both had a choice, whether to connect to or not. We chose to make a connection and it actually met her need for support and acknowledgement at that time. Just thinking ... what had been my need there??
I meet so many people everyday; the security guard who gives me a smile when I walk across him, the acknowledgement of the conductor of the bus who has noticed that I am the only one in the bus getting down in the last stop and I could go on... But, do I connect with them? A nod, a smile and then I do not think about it anymore. Is there a connection there or is it that I choose not to connect more than that?
Sometimes a bond develops with people whom we are meeting for the first time. We don't mind sharing our thoughts, feelings with them. We take the risk of opening up, becoming vulnerable to them without knowing them well. How does that happen? Are we aware that we are choosing to do so or it happens naturally?
Two years back, I was down with dengue admitted in the hospital and sharing the room with an elderly person being looked after by a young girl. While going through the agonising wait of my blood count to go up, I noticed that the young girl did not know any language other than hindi. She was finding it hard to converse with the nurses and was looking sad. Anyways, I had nothing much to do, so started talking to her. There was a slight hesitation in the beginning but, then she opened up and talked about her village, her brother who had brought her here and how this was her first job. We spoke for a long time, she asked lots of questions and was at ease after that.
As the elderly patient was not used to her, he refused to drink from her hands and was being difficult, so I went up to him, spoke to him in tamil and ended up feeding him.
All this happened over a period of four days, after which I was discharged. That girl was not happy at all and was worried how she would handle after I left. I assured her that she would manage. I also gave her my phone number incase she needed to talk to someone.
After few days, I received a call and it was the girl from the hospital. She said," Didi, it is me. Uncle was released the next day and he is fine. My brother bought me a mobile and I thought of you. You are the first person I have called. I wanted to tell you that I am doing fine and thank you for helping me in the hospital".
This was such an unexpected surprise. It actually made me think that in the hospital we both had a choice, whether to connect to or not. We chose to make a connection and it actually met her need for support and acknowledgement at that time. Just thinking ... what had been my need there??
what do you do when people want to converse,form a relation with you ,connect and you cant do it due to various reasons like time , priorities, interests, topics/interest of conversations etc.
ReplyDeleteHow do we handle situations in which people are more then willing to connect and we as person cant do it?
Do we all connect because of our need or convenience of interest ,time or whatever reason could be?
What do you think ?
Neetu