Trip to Sittilingi

Mountains in the backdrop with the r them, lush green fields around, the sound of a stream flowing, cute little huts ... this is the village of sittilingi where we spent a quiet diwali. It was a wonderful experience without the sounds and smell of crackers.
My brother and his wife who stay at Thulir(education resource centre for children and youngsters) invited us for diwali to this wonderful place.
We started around 7am and reached thulir aound 12pm. It was a holiday so the children did not come. We lazed around, children went for walk aound the place and they thoroughly enjoyed themselves. We went to the land which my brother has bought out there. Children and Partha enjoyed plucking mangoes(unripe). We even saw a house which has not been occupied for ages now housing snakes and ghosts(according to the villagers)
The next day we met the children and then attended the class which my brother took for them. We did a few origami stuff ..it was fun. Later varun observed water testing.
Partha and children went for a walk in the evening to the stream nearby and the children thoroughly enjoyed themselves.
The next day morning after breakfast was time to leave the place. We bought a few key chains and soap which the girls make out there for sale.it was raining and the journey back was scary. The visibility was bad but we managed to make it back safely.
The trip was a memorable one. A big thanks to Sanjeev and Anita for making it possible.

Stage

All round you could see excited eager faces. It was annual day of our campus and we were having a cultural event. Children dressed up in different costumes, parents running around doing the last minute make up for them.. the whole place was colourful and lively. In the midst of all this there were the tiny tots just two or two and a half also dressed up in complicated costume and there was a clear discomfort on their faces. Others calling them cute and pulling their cheeks, hugging and holding them at their will. After all this when the time came for the children to be on stage most of them stuck to their mothers and refused to get down. One or two children in the end due to the persistence of the parent stood on the stage but the others refused and ended up being carried by the mother for the whole programme.

Just thinking what is it that makes a parent to do this. Is it the eagerness to give their child exposure or is it just they are just getting to satisfy their whims and fancies because the child does not have a say. What would the child be thinking in those uncomfortable clothes, how would he/she be feeling, what is he thinking about the elders around him who do not treat him as an individual?

Why is it so difficult for parents to allow the child to be just be? Why are we so eager to show off our children in front of others treating them like puppets? Why do parents and adults feel that a child has to prove himself/herself in front of others all the time. Is it our insecurity with ourselves?

When a child is constantly showcased in front of others ..and the child is constantly fed with appreciation or praise would he be doing things only to get that praise or would he still enjoy what he is doing?

It is about time we as parents sit back and think about our actions and the thought process behind it and allow space to our children to grow at their own pace.

Star

A few days back:
Varsha: Mummy I made a mistake in maths. But we learn from making mistakes na? There were some children who got star in English. I did not get any star. Mummy, I was still happy because I know it does not matter. You love me anyway.

I knew she was feeling not so good about it and she was trying to work on it. Hopefully by allowing her to express her feelings and acknowledging it will help her to internalise it too one day.
They have a very funny system at school they give stars for keeping quiet and then when they meet the parents they say she is a very quiet girl and you need to encourage her to talk :-)