Experiences..

Recently I attended two workshops. One was a ten day workshop. There were about seventy of us in the group. On the first day the facilitators stated their expectations with regard to the session rules. One of them was to be on time and the other was to keep our mobile phones switched off. It did not stop there, they also mentioned that a fine of Rs.100/- would be slapped on people who did not follow the rules. I did not really agree with the punitive part of it as I think we are capable people who understand the ethics of different environments and did not need an external force to make us obey.
Anyways, my thoughts to myself.
Despite the rule, people came in late, phones did ring and there was a nice collection at the end of the course for a scrumptious meal :-)
Looking back, did I get disturbed by the phone rings?.Hmmmm 'No' I was totally focused on what the facilitator was saying so it did not matter to me at all.
The second workshop was a two day workshop where the facilitator just mentioned about keeping the mobile phones on silent and requested us to go out and take the call. Again, phones did ring and people went out to talk and it did not disturb me at all.
As a participant I did not get affected.
How does it affect me if I am taking a session?
When I started taking sessions I did not state any expectations of any sort to the participants with regard to mobiles or even time, as I was working from the belief that I am there only to share my perspectives and it is totally upto them what they do with it. Phones would buzz, people walk out and in, people come in late etc etc. Till now, I have ignored or I am so involved with the content of the session that it has not disturbed me for me to really sit and think about it as an issue.
The belief that each one is there for their own reason has helped me to be focused on myself and my content.

There was one experience which was really interesting and a learning for me. In one of the groups there was one person who would doze of in the session. She would be right in front of me and would be sleeping. When I saw this, in the beginning it really disturbed me. I started asking myself.. am I responsible for this, am I not taking the session properly and I would look around for a reassurance that I was doing ok. I decided that it was not doing me any good in thinking this way, so I decided to work on it. I observed her when she would doze off and I saw her very peaceful. It seemed as if this was a place where she could take some time off and rest or she would be running after her children or doing the chores. This thought lifted the burden off my shoulders. The next time I saw her dozing off, it brought a smile to my lips at the thought that my talking was like a lullabye to her and she was getting the rest she deserved.

This was a big learning for me that I need not go around changing anything or anyone when things are not going my way, it works for me when I change my way of thinking about something or someone.