Navaratri at home

My learning..

The cultural programme was the latest talk in our campus. Lots of parents were trying to get their children to participate in some prog or the other. Older kids were forming groups and coming up with their own skits, dances. I was the lazy one .. not too interested. Varun told me that he was not going to participate this time and I was like ah! relaxed... well! it could not be that simple :-) Varsha wanted to dance. She was insistent that this time she wanted to be on stage and dance.

I had to do something this time.After some searching came to know that one of my friends was preparing for a dance. I requested her and she obliged. Varsha was excited and eager to learn. In four days varsha learnt the steps and she would be dancing and singing all the time. The D-Day came. I was little worried whether she would be comfortable in her costume (she is normally very sensitive about the feel of her clothes) but today was different. She got up happy and full of life.

She got ready and there was not a single sound from her about her costume, hair. When i blundered while putting her tattoo mehndi, she actually told me,'It's ok ... atleast there is something on my hand.. we should be happy with what we have.'

When she was dancing on the stage I could see her smiling and really enjoying herself. She wanted to dance.. she found a way and nothing stopped her from enjoying every moment of it. My goal... I find the way

Varsha is second in the line with brown/red dupatta

Varsha's bee story

It was amazing to watch varsha do this project on her own, using her imagination. She showed confidence while drawing the borders, writing the content, drawing and then colouring it.

Varun's gift

A few days back, I was on the phone with my friend and Varun suddenly came up behind me and hugged me. I was surprised, he whispered,'After you finish talking I want to talk to you'. When I completed my call I called him to ask what he wanted to tell me. He came and hugged me tightly. I hugged him too and told him that I loved him. He said,'Mummy I was reading Oliver Twist and I realise now, how much you mean to me, you do so many things for me even without my asking.. I love you.'

What he gave me was a precious gift of connection.

Varsha making chapatis

Children enjoy doing things when it comes from within them and when the pushing starts from our side they don't want to do it anymore.

Giving..

Last year, I fell sick. I was down with fever and for five days in bed without knowing what was happening around me. My husband took care of the children, home, everything. I am not used to it but was not in a position to do much. Got admitted in the hospital as it was diagnosed as dengue.

While, I was in the hospital battling the up and down of the blood platelets, my mom had taken my children. I was not able to see my children but I knew they were in safe hands and I was thankful for that.

After four days when I returned home, I was very weak and tired and before I could think of anything, my friends took over and provided me with breakfast, lunch and dinner for one full week and would have continued if I had not stopped them.

At the time I realised that I like to contibute to other's lives by offering support, but it was so difficult to accept when others want to do the same. Maybe, somewhere I was being selfish by not allowing others to feel the same joy I feel when I do things for others.

I have admitted to myself that as I love to give others, I would also like to be supported by others and accept it graciously.

'No man can be happy without a friend,
nor be sure of his friend till he is unhappy'
Thomas Fuller,M.D.

Capable of more..

Today, went to the school to collect the report cards of the children. Varsha's teacher while giving the report card and her worksheets mentioned that she wanted to talk to me about something. She told me that varsha had not done too well in the last session. When, I looked at her sheets she seemed to have done well ... 21/25, 17/25 etc. I mentioned that to the teacher and she shook her head saying,'she is capable of much more'.
When I told her that all this was Varsha's efforts and I had very little to do with it, the teacher advised me to spend more time on her.
I left the school wondering and still wondering what is it about marks which is so important? If I had sat with her, made her study and prepared her for the tests with the same format.. she might have done well(as per the teacher) .. would it mean that she has understood concepts or would I be conditioning her to work in a certain way to get marks. If a child secures the required marks does it mean he understands what he has done. Even after so many changes happening around us, we are still not able to change our mindset, our conditioning. Why is marks the only criteria which defines whether a child is intelligent or not?
It is time that we change the way we look at things, change the way we think and also change the way we do things. The least we can do is to change the way we work with our children at home by giving them acceptance, freedom, allowing them to make mistakes with the hope that they will reach out and work for what they want from life.